Empathy is one of those words that gets tossed around without much explanation. Having empathy is said to improve your marriage, your career, your parenting skills, your emotional well-being, your friendships, and basically your life. It has become the emotional aspirin of our day. But what does that really mean in the practical sense? How… (more…)
As Tad hung up the phone, he realized he did it again. He fell for the trap and now it is over. Tad wanted so much to have a relationship with his estranged adult daughter that he kept trying to converse with her. But at nearly every turn, she set a trap for him to… (more…)
Ever wondered what abuse sounds like? What do abusers say to their victims to get them to acquiesce? Some of the statements listed below might even sound acceptable in certain environments, but they are not. Abusive behavior is pervasive and without awareness, it will continue. There are seven major types of abuse. Physical abuse is intimidation,… (more…)
At the start of their initial marriage counseling session, I asked Kevin and Karen, “What can I help you with?” With equal amounts of conviction, both of them said communication. As a therapist, I admit that upon hearing this statement I immediately dismiss it. The reasoning is simple: most people who enter marriage counseling struggle… (more…)
Rebecca is a middle school English teacher. Previously she worked in a local public school but was frustrated by the number of daily lies from her students. Thinking the private school environment would be better, she switched. But what she found was even more creative lies that her students would tell her. One day she… (more…)
Mike was confused. Even though he was successful, he struggled with personal connections. He had professional relationships but they were very superficial and work-only oriented. When he tried to converse outside of business matters, he sounded awkward and unintelligent. Home wasn’t any better. His relationship with his wife centered on discussing only severe matters about… (more…)
Miscommunication happens often enough face to face. But it happens far more frequently over text messages. Alice was texting back and forth with her boyfriend when suddenly he went silent after a simple question. In the middle of a meeting, John received a three page text message from his ex-wife. Sandy accidently sent an intimate… (more…)
I stopped by a home improvement store this morning to pick up a few things for an after work project. Unable to find what I needed, a sales associate guided me to the right place and assisted in selecting the needed products. A casual comment led to an enlightening and engaging conversation with the sales… (more…)
Do you have the same argument with your spouse over and over? Can you recite their response even before you begin? Are you losing interest in even having conversations with them? This can be the beginning of no communication cumulating in an unhappy marriage or divorce. There is a better way. It can change. By listening, looking and… (more…)
Have you ever had a fight with your computer? Everything is going fine one minute and the next thing you know the computer begins to act up. It starts with one program and then leads to another. You fight back by shutting down the dysfunctional program and trying to control or anticipate the next problem. … (more…)
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