Ever wonder why depression seems so much worse during the holiday season? Some of the reasons may be a surprise, while others seem very obvious. Each one of these is based on real personal struggles. Humbuggery. This word is made famous in Charles Dicken’s story, A Christmas Carol, where Scrooge frequently says, “Bah-Humbug.” The pure… (more…)
For the first time in 16 years, Janice was going to spend Thanksgiving without her kids. Even though the divorce was finalized in the summer, she did not realize until a week before the holiday that her kids would spend the entire week with her ex. She was devastated. The traditions she so purposefully cultivated… (more…)
The first Thanksgiving and Hanukkah without her husband of 47 years, nothing seemed right. For the first time, Nikki was not hosting either celebration, her daughter and son took the holidays over to relieve her stress. But without the rituals and traditions, she felt more isolated and alone. Nikki took a deep breath to hold… (more…)
Twenty years ago, my best friend took her life. She was plagued by severe bipolar and despite medication and treatment, she was unable to get better. She had a genius IQ, was beautiful, a delight to be around, a deep thinker, and obtained a Ph.D. by her early twenties. She was an amazing friend. I… (more…)
Dorothy lost her husband of 30 years this past year. She knew the holidays would be hard but didn’t know they would be this difficult. Every ornament she hung reminded her of him. The cookies she baked were his favorites. Even her adult kids couldn’t help but talk about what their dad would be doing…. (more…)
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Margie was devastated when her mother passed away. Her mom was diagnosed with cancer one month and then gone by the next. She had a close relationship with her mom and frequently leaned on her for support in her marriage, parenting her kids, and balancing family and work. The loss left a huge hole in… (more…)
It was only after the nursing home started setting decorating for Christmas that Norman realized this would be the first year without his wife at home. Worse yet, based on his last visit with her, she most likely would not remember any part of their 50 years together. The Alzheimer’s had taken over her brain… (more…)
Perhaps a new custody agreement has the kids spending the holidays with their other parent. Or perhaps this is the first holiday after the death of a loved one. Or perhaps a family member is deployed with limited contact. Or perhaps a recent break-up in a relationship immediately changes the plans already made. Whichever the… (more…)
Not everyone grieves in the same way. People have different physical appearances, perspectives, experiences, thoughts, emotions, backgrounds, relationships, and attitudes. So when it comes to grieving, there are many healthy forms with the exception of one: not grieving. Embracing grief is a willingness to accept the fluctuating emotions, random thoughts, internal struggles, constant questions, and… (more…)
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