Hands down, the number one question I get asked in therapy is “Why would they do this?” Mostly, this stems from a person who has been abused and is trying desperately to understand why their attacker is abusive. There are seven forms of abuse: verbal, mental, emotional, physical, sexual, financial, and spiritual. After a person… (more…)
Being the victim of a narcissistic smear attack is not fun. Rather, it is an intense campaign designed to humiliate an opponent while simultaneously elevating the narcissist. It requires quite a bit of skill, manipulation, and persistence to successfully pull one-off. But for the victim, it can be a shocking and damaging experience. In an… (more…)
The short answer is yes. While this might seem like a strange concept, those who have been victims understand it all too well. An acquaintance starts sending excessive messages, magically showing up unexpectedly, asks too intimate or probing questions, gives inappropriate gifts, and seems to immerse themselves into environments or other friendships just to stay… (more…)
Twenty years ago, men were the thought of as the main perpetrators of workplace sexual harassment with women as their victims. Having been one of those victims in two separate work industry environments, with a boss and co-worker, the demoralizing encounter left a scar. It was frustrating to be recognized not for my hard work… (more…)
It’s easy to identify bullying, intimidation, physical restraint, or molestation as abusive. But what about other, more subtle forms of abuse that seem on the surface to be kind and generous, they are not. Think of it as a mask of deception used to control, manipulate, and eventually abuse. To the outside world, the mask… (more…)
A bruise should not be the requirement for evidence of parental abuse. There are many other ways a child can be harmed. While this list may not be all-inclusive, it is meant to expand on the traditional definition of child abuse. Most states recognize some aspects of sexual abuse, physical abuse, or neglect but fail… (more…)
The Overt Narcissists are easy to spot as they literally suck the life out of a room and absorb all of the positive and negative attention. They love to be on center stage, need constant admiration, crave affection even from inappropriate sources, and seek adoration affirmation. The Covert Narcissists (CN) or the Silent Narcissists are… (more…)
Movies love to portray the inner and outer conflict that arises from being blackmailed, especially when someone’s life hangs in the balance. There is the villain (the blackmailer), the victim (the target), a demand (what is being asked for), and a threat (what negative thing will happen if the victim refuses to comply). But blackmail… (more…)
Healing from a narcissistic parent has a positive effect on all of the other close relationships in a person’s life. The distorted perception of reality a narcissistic parent imposes on a child can have damaging consequences as an adult at work and home. The lack of self-esteem, obsessive thinking, minimization of abuse, excessive anxiety, and… (more…)
A weakness of a narcissist is their extreme hatred of being embarrassed. There is nothing worse for them than having someone point out even the slightest fault. Ironically, they have no problem openly doing this to others. This method of casting shame allows them to feel superior while minimizing any impact the other person might… (more…)
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